自由英作文のドッキリポイント30（減点される意外なミス）

ドッキリ①　問いに答えていない（内容点が消える）6

問：Do you agree that high school students should wear school uniforms?

• ✕There are both advantages and disadvantages to school uniforms.
  ○I agree that high school students should wear school uniforms.
  賛否を問われて両論併記は「答えていない」扱い。1文目で立場を1つに。
• ✕School uniforms have a long history in Japan.
  ○I agree because uniforms help students focus on studying.
  歴史の話は問いの答えではない。問いの語（wear uniforms）で答える。
• ✕問：What is the most important thing in life? → There are three important things.
  ○The most important thing in life is good health.
  「最も〜」は1つを問う問題。複数挙げた時点で題意違反。
• ✕指示「理由を2つ」に First, … Second, … Third, …
  ○First, … Second, … の2つだけ
  数の指示は条件。違反と見られうるうえ、各理由も薄くなる。
• ✕結論：However, I think it depends on the situation.
  ○For these reasons, I believe students should wear uniforms.
  最後の「場合による」は主張の撤回。序論と結論の一致が構成点の核。
• ✕Some people think that students should wear uniforms. I agree with this.（問題文の丸写し）
  ○I believe that wearing uniforms benefits high school students.
  写した部分は評価されにくく語数稼ぎに見える。自分の言葉で言い換える。

ドッキリ②　理由・具体例が理由になっていない6

• ✕Studying abroad is good because it is a valuable experience.
  ○Studying abroad is good because students have to communicate in a foreign language every day.
  valuable は good の言い換えで循環論法。「なぜ価値があるか」まで書く。
• ✕AI is useful for many things.
  ○AI can translate a long article into Japanese in seconds.
  many things のままでは説得力ゼロ。場面を1つに絞って具体化する。
• ✕Reading improves vocabulary. For example, I read a book every week.
  ○For example, I learned the word “reluctant” from a novel.
  例が「読んでいる」事実の繰り返し。語彙が増えた証拠を示す例にする。
• ✕I like wearing uniforms, so schools should require them.
  ○Uniforms reduce the pressure to buy fashionable clothes.
  好き嫌いは理由にならない。他人や社会にとっての利点で論じる。
• ✕About 90 percent of students want a longer summer vacation.
  ○Many students would welcome a longer summer vacation.
  出典のない数字は作り話に見える。根拠を示せない数字は使わない。
• ✕Everyone uses AI, so students will never think for themselves.
  ○If students rely too much on AI, they may think less for themselves.
  everyone・never の極論は反例1つで崩れる。most・may で守る。

ドッキリ③　つなぎ・文のつなぎ方で論理が壊れる6

• ✕Smartphones are useful. On the other hand, they are cheap.
  ○Smartphones are useful. In addition, they are easy to carry.
  on the other hand は「対照」専用。追加に使うと論理が逆向きになる。
• ✕In conclusion, uniforms are good. Also, they are easy to wash.
  ○In conclusion, I believe uniforms are good for the two reasons above.
  結論で新しい理由を出すのは構成の乱れ。結論は主張の再確認とまとめに。
• ✕It is expensive, however, it is worth the money.
  ○It is expensive. However, it is worth the money.
  however は副詞で接続詞ではない。前はピリオドかセミコロンにする。
• ✕For example, smartphones and tablets.
  ○For example, many students use tablets to review lessons.
  For example, の後は完全な文。名詞を並べるだけなら such as を使う。
• ✕I prefer living in a city. Because it is convenient.
  ○I prefer living in a city because it is convenient.
  because 節は従属節で、単独では文にならない（文の断片）。
• ✕Online classes are convenient, students can study at home.
  ○Online classes are convenient because students can study at home.
  カンマだけで2文をつなぐのは誤り。ピリオドか接続詞でつなぐ。

ドッキリ④　「通じる」けれど減点される文法6

• ✕Recently, many people pay with their smartphones.
  ○These days, many people pay with their smartphones.
  recently は普通、過去形・現在完了と使う。今の習慣は these days。
• ✕Smartphone is useful for students.
  ○Smartphones are useful for students.
  数えられる名詞を裸の単数で使わない。総称は複数形が最も安全。
• ✕I think it is not a good idea.
  ○I do not think it is a good idea.
  誤りではないが、否定は think 側に出す方が普通で、控えめに響く。
• ✕Last year I join a volunteer club and learn a lot.
  ○Last year I joined a volunteer club and learned a lot.
  意見は現在形、体験は過去形。体験談の途中で現在形に戻りやすい。
• ✕If you study abroad, you can make friends from many countries.
  ○Students who study abroad can make friends from many countries.
  一般論の you は誤りではないが話しかける口調。答案は students が安全。
• ✕I enjoy sports such as soccer, baseball, and so on.
  ○I enjoy sports such as soccer and baseball.
  such as に and so on・etc. を足すと重複気味。例は2つで十分。

ドッキリ⑤　文体と語数の思わぬ落とし穴6

• ✕I don't think it's necessary.
  ○I do not think it is necessary.
  短縮形は誤りではないがくだけた印象。答案では展開形が無難。
• ✕Kids have lots of stuff to do after school.
  ○Children have many things to do after school.
  kids・stuff はくだけた語、lots of もやや口語的。改まった語にする。
• ✕So, I agree with this idea.
  ○Therefore, I agree with this idea.
  文頭の So は誤りではないがくだけた印象。答案は Therefore が無難。
• ✕Smartphones are really, really useful!
  ○Smartphones are extremely useful.
  ! や really の連発は感情的。答案は冷静な論述文として書く。
• ✕指定80〜100語に対して68語（または120語）
  ○80〜100語の範囲内に収める
  範囲外は内容が良くても減点されうる。語数指定は「条件」と考える。
• ✕数え方を確かめず下限ぴったりの80語で出す
  ○下限より数語多めにして余裕を持たせる
  ハイフン語や数字の数え方は試験で異なる。数え方の差で範囲外にしない。